on loneliness

it’s okay to feel lonely. it’s okay to be alone.

loneliness has an elusive way of loving me and hating me all at the same time. it comes up behind me, wraps its arms around and pulls me down slowly as if it’s a tired lover pulling me to bed. but then when i reach the pillows, i realize they’re not pillows at all, but fluffy versions of sorrow and despair. but. they’re so fluffy, i can’t help but bounce around with them…shaking them off with a giggle as if refusing to dance with a cute but uninteresting boy. they don’t stick. they never stick.

i see the sadness, i feel it softly. then i shake it off.

and the sadness and loneliness scoff off in rejection and decide to hate me until they try to love me again.

and again, i’m free. free from the pain that punches so many to the ground. free from the hurt that havocs so many all around.

but i’m still alone. and i know that it’s okay to feel lonely. it’s okay to be alone.

because. i never let it stick.


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